Hello. I finally released my new book on Amazon. It is a scary thing to put something so personal out there for others to read, but the story needed to come out. Rape and incest are so prevalent in our society, but when I was a child you never heard of those kinds of things happening. I am not saying they were not, I am proof they were, but people, and families did not talk about it. Sad for the victims who had to suffer in silence.
Silence is a deadly weapon used by many who do not want the truth to come out. For the victims who suffer, it only makes the nightmares that much worse. By telling my story I hope to release the demons that have haunted me my whole life, as well as to encourage other victims to tell their stories.
Do not let the abusers get away with their crime. I will post the link as soon as I can to my new book. I have been having some trouble with getting it to load correctly. I think it is just too new.
Thanks for your patience. I hope that you will read it and share it with others. If you have the time please leave a review as that would help with my standing in Amazon.
Check it out and please share your feedback. And as I always say, have a great day, you and I deserve it.
Yes it is the new year, 2021. I can not believe it when I look at that number. I remember when I was growing up and thinking toward the future, 2021 was so far away. I thought we would have traveled far into another galaxy or dimension by now, but nope, we are right here, right now on planet earth. So what are we going to do different?
I say the only goal we really need to set for ourselves is the goal to be a better person! If we head that direction all the other little stuff will fall into place like eating right, exercising, controlling our anger, getting a grip on our spending, and loving our family. We can include forgiveness in there if we feel up to that part. Also patience with ourselves because change is hard on any level.
I gave up chocolate on the first of this year, and last night on the second night of the year I ate two chocolate muffins and drank a cup of milk. My reasoning was that I did not want them to go to waste, so I thought I should just get them out of the freezer, before they got freezer burn, and eat them. They were delicious and made me feel like shit. So much for that resolution. I will try another later.
We can set any goals we want, be anything we want, go in any direction we want. It starts with that first step, and that first day. As far as I am concerned everyday can be the first day, so today I ate salmon and salad. I feel great.
In the chaos that is flowing around I ask you to take a moment to listen to some really special music. Something soft and flowing, perhaps without words so that you will not be distracted. Let the music carry you away. Let go of your troubles and worries, they can come back later.
I listened to some of the most beautiful music by ” Hauser” he is one of the worlds greatest cello players. Actually he and his friend have been a group of two for years called 2cellos. They are fabulous. And they are lovely to look at too.
I listened to them playing the song ” hallelujah” and the music pierced my heart traveling all the way through into the universe. It was like I was at a standstill floating freely among the stars, and the music. It was so lovely. And no I was not under the influence of anything but the music coming out of that box and into my heart. I felt in that moment that there was nothing in life worth giving up such a wonderful sense of peace for. We must not let the day to day chaos injure our souls. It is not worth losing that sense of peace over some garbage that we can’t even control.
When you are feeling down find something to lift up your mood. Music is the best weapon against the dark side. It has the ability to help us let go of the inner turmoil. It is magical in it’s power to bring about a change in us, and the things around us. Music has been shown to even soothe the animal world.
So go to You tube, we all love You Tube, and watch a video by ” Hauser” or the 2 cellos and let your sadness and pain flow away. We are perfect just the way are. We just need a little tweaking every now and then, and music can be that instrument. And as I always say have a great day today, you and I deserve it.
I am proud to be an American. In 2005 I became an American Citizen. It was my choice!!
Well, like so many I too have this years elections as the main thing streaming through my mind right now. How could we not with so much garbage streaming across the airways. Sadly as far as I am concerned there isn’t a good candidate, there hasn’t been for years, so I ask everyone to think hard before they vote in the next few days. Really look at what is good for our country right now. Pick one of the lesser of two evils if you can and then lets all move toward making this country a thing to be proud of. For me I get to listen to my Canadian family laugh at the nuts we have in office, and the way that everyone has gone crazy disrespecting this country for four long years. Perhaps with the end of the election will come the end of all the slinging of shit, and our politicians will get down to the job of running this country for the people, by the people so help me God.
Well I thought I had it. Yep. I was feeling pretty weird, sickish, but not real sick for about ten days. Strange sore throat which I still have off and on, hot and cold spells, a bad night of night sweats, fatigue, headaches, and a few other things. Luckily no fever, but I still called the clinic and they put me through to their screening booth.
Interesting events unfold when you suspect the dreaded Covid. They asked me a whole round of questions, decided I needed to come in for testing, what with my age, history of asthma, and symptoms. And, when I showed up for the appointment they had set up I was greeted at the door
First though I had to call from my car to alert them to my presence on the grounds. Once in the room the treatment team looked like characters out of ET. Well not quite so intense, but it still made me feel ” contaminated.”
Still learning, still searching the data banks.
I will admit I was a little scared. After hearing all the serious things that have happened to some folks who have had the virus, I was definitely frightened. We have tried to be cautious, but I think we are all getting a little lax in our protection.
With a sigh of relief I can tell you I am virus free. The test was negative, but I think she hemorrhaged my brain reaching to the farthest depths of my inner sinuses. I felt the burn as she rammed then twirled that swab to the inner sanctum of my nose. I would have suffered more if I had needed too, and I have in the past, just to be sure that all was well within.
I know that lots of people have had this dreaded disease and survived just fine. It’s the ones that have gotten so sick that makes me pause and take a breath. I have had breast cancer, as you may be aware, so I know what it is to fear having something that could potentially kill you. Okay, the Covid virus isn’t as serious as cancer, but for some it has been horrific. We must not take away from those poor folks and their struggles.
Don’t let the meanies get to you.
I hope that anyone who actually catches this dam virus, including the president and his team, who may be suffering right now, has a fast recovery, with minimal side effects. We still don’t know all the symptoms or lasting effects of the Covid virus. It is something we all wish was only studied in books, not real life.
I say take care of you, love your loved ones, as in a blink of an eye, they or you could be gone. And we must appreciate this great big world we live in. There is so much beauty, so many wonderful things. We have so many blessings to hold dear. Don’t let the media or anyone else take away your happiness. If they try question their motive. People that don’t want others to be happy are evil. At the very least they are shitty people. And as I always say, have a great day TODAY.
Sometimes I can’t wait for things to happen. Okay, most times. I am not a planner, more the “when it hits me”in the moment kind of person. Often I decide what I want to do for the day, or the minute, right at that time. It’s like the excitement slams into me and away I go. I don’t usually like to plan too far ahead because I may not feel like doing anything that far into the future. I hate to disappoint people if we make plans and I cancel because sometimes the energy gets lost in the wait.
Well that very thing happened to me. The energy was leaving my body as I had to wait for almost two weeks to get my hair cut. I had found a shop that was suppose to have these really good hairstylist, but they didn’t have anyone available until the end of my vacation. I wanted it cut now so I could get use to the short “do” while lounging around the house. No trips for me thanks to the virus.
I had such an overpowering “urge” to get my hair cut ” right this minute” that I called another place, and in my haste I went there instead. They said she was good with short hair. I foolishly believed them.
I could tell right away she was a newbie by the way she washed my hair, really gently, so gently that I almost couldn’t feel her fingers moving. It was like she was afraid I would start screaming in pain if she pressed a little hard. I wanted to tell her to “have at it” as I have been known to be hard headed, but I didn’t want to spoil her zen.
When we were done with the wash the comb traveled at the sped of a snail through my hair. Everything seemed to be going in slow motion. I finally had to ask how long she had been doing hair. ” Since December” she replied, ” almost a year.” It was September now.
Dread hit me hard as I watched her scissors slicing through my hair. First this way, then that way her comb and scissors moved. And, the direction was always upward.
What the hell?
I will tell you that once upon a time I graduated from beauty school. That’s what it was called back then. I did not go on to become a hair dresser because I had no talent. My future flashed before my eyes at graduation. All I saw were bobby pins and old ladies. I shivered and moved on to factory work. That I was good at!
But, what I learned was that as you ” raise” the scissors and hair upward the hair gets shorter. Makes sense right. Did I mention that I had a picture of the hair cut I wanted. I had a front and rear view as I have had bad experiences in the past. These did not help her.
She showed me the back once as she questioned ” is this alright.” It hit me that she didn’t have a clue about cutting hair. It was all chopped up into layers. Not pretty layers that blended well, but chunks of layers, like a staircase. Not at all like the picture that was suppose to be almost one layer to the nap of my neck.
I pointed this out, and she said ” oh I’ll fix that” as if she could magically put my longer hair back, and continued slicing upward. After a few minutes I finally had to tell her to stop it was so short and lopsided. I pointed out that my haircut did not even look like the picture and all she did was bat her eyes at me.
I jumped out of the chair and told her to leave it, and like a coward I paid and left. What I really wanted to do was yell for the manager and scream my disgust over the terrible hair cut I had just received. And how dare they tell people that ” Katy was good with hair” when she cuts like a butcher.
I shed a lot of tears when I got home, and for several days afterward as I tried to moose down the flying chunks that wouldn’t stay put. Then I remembered the tears I shed when chemotherapy took all my hair away. I guess I better be glad with what I have before it gets taken away again. See, there is always a positive way to look at life even when your are pissed. Have a great day!
